Saturday, October 18, 2008

And the new leader of the New Brunswick Progressive Conservative Party is...

Woodstock MLA David Alward. He beat Robert MacLeod by a vote of 2,269 to 1,760 at a leadership convention held in Fredericton. Party members could also vote at satellite polling stations around the province.

Friday, October 17, 2008

KazooKeylele - Ukulele - The final countdown

A toy piano, ukelele and kazoo are melted into one very cool contraption.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Republican rednecks have their say on Barack Obama... scary!

Tips for the man who can't get elected to anything

Hump Day
By Brian Cormier
Moncton Times & Transcript
Editorial Page
Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Well, it's the morning after the federal election. If you hate politics, you're likely thrilled to bits that it's over.

Now, all that's left is the analysis and figuring out where we go from here as a country. Congratulations to the winners! And please remember to represent everyone in your constituencies, not just those who openly supported you.

Even for those of us, like me, who love elections and politics, getting so emotionally involved takes a real toll. You can't imagine why so-called reasonable people can't see things your way, and people on the opposing side likely feel the same.

"Why would you vote for Johnny Braindead? He can't even tie his shoes or properly pronounce 'subpoena' without giggling."

"Oh yeah? And why would you vote for Peter Evildoer? When he campaigns in nursing homes, he greases the tips of the little old ladies' canes and then laughs when they slip and fall."

"Oh yeah? Well, Johnny Braindead is so dumb that he once signed the wrong name when someone asked for his autograph."

"Oh yeah? I heard Peter Evildoer is so cheap that he put his father in a nursing home that feeds its residents expired no-name dog food."

You get the drift. Like I said, even for someone who loves politics like me, it gets really tiresome after a bit. People just need to remember that it's a really small town and that words said against someone else can come back to haunt you whether you're the winning or losing candidate. Of course, it helps if you won, because you are then in the position of power, but you won't be there forever!

My own personal forays into the political arena have been disastrous. So far, I haven't been able to even get myself elected president of the Association of People Who Can't Get Elected to Anything. This is a sad statement in itself, considering that I was running unopposed and am the only member of the group. Maybe I didn't like the election pamphlet I sent to myself? Maybe I wanted to double my own taxes? Well, that was a stupid thing to do, now, wasn't it? I should have bribed myself with booze.

However the chips fell across the country last night, I just hope that everyone exercised their duty to vote. Whether you voted with your head, your heart or held your nose and voted strategically to keep a party out of the running in your constituency, voting is an essential part of the democratic process. If you don't vote, you have no right to complain. That may sound like a cliché, but it's very true.

To all you young people out there who don't feel like your thoughts and ideas are being listened to by politicians, you only have yourselves to blame. If, as a group, you stay away from the ballot box in droves, you simply become less important to people running for office. I'm not saying they don't care, but it would help your cause immensely if you voted en masse.

Ever notice why every politician runs around passing out cookies, chocolates and juice to residents in retirement homes? It's because they vote. And since you know they're going to vote, they may just vote against you if you don't show up to cajole them into voting for you with a few kind words, a date-filled cookie and a smile.

When politicians are elected to office, it's my belief that they need to put aside their political differences as much as possible and help anyone in their constituency who needs it. Health care, education, hunger and jobs should know no political boundaries.

Thank goodness we live in a country where most of our politicians are decent human beings who take their local responsibilities seriously. A politician who is overtly partisan and refuses to help anyone but his or her friends will likely not be around for long. Sure, you may get elected once, but watch out in the next election! There's nothing more ornery than a large number of voters left out in the cold because they don't feel like they're being fairly represented. That must be why I didn't win election to the presidency of the Association of People Who Can't Get Elected to Anything.

My two furry constituents must not like their food! That must be it. Wait, the cats don't even have the right to vote. Part 5, Section 1 of our bylaws clearly states: "In order to vote, a member must not have paws or bathe with their own tongue." At least one of those two clauses rules me out.

Perhaps getting elected to high office isn't all it's cracked up to be? I mean, I know you get a pretty good paycheque. You get invited to all kinds of high mucky-muck dinners with things on the menu so fancy that you can't even pronounce them (or even figure out what they are by looking at them), and people always return your calls.

But you also have to pretend to care when someone comes to you with a completely nutty idea. Since I wear my heart on my sleeve, to hear someone advocate government funding to build a daycare that only caters to baby crocodiles named Ralph would be a bit hard to take. I'd have to resist booting them out of my office, accepting the fact that I would lose votes from the pet crocodile owners lobby, of course.

Well, I've decided that the only way to get elected head of the Association of People Who Can't Get Elected to Anything is to sleep my way to the top! I'm going to get myself drunk and then take advantage of myself. The things a politician has to do!

You won't believe who's 62 today...

Suzanne Somers, famous for playing dimwitted Chrissy Snow in Three's Company from 1977 to 1981 and Carol Foster Lambert on Step by Step from 1991 to 1998, turns 62 today. She has since reinvented herself as a well-respected authority on health and wellness. By the look of her most recent book cover (see above photo), she looks at least 25 years younger than her real age, so she must know what she's talking about!

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Happy 60th birthday to singer Chris de Burgh...

Irish singer Chris de Burgh (born in Argentina, though....) is 60 today. I saw him in concert about 17 years ago in Fredericton. It was excellent! Here are a couple of his hit songs...

The Lady in Red

Don't Pay the Ferryman

This week's Hump Day column...

... is about elections and my inability to get elected to anything - even when I'm running unopposed and I'm the only member of the organization. Not great for the ego, I tell ya!

Check out Hump Day on the editorial page of today's Moncton Times & Transcript or visit here tomorrow when it will be posted online.

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Brian Murphy re-elected as Member of Parliament for Moncton-Riverview-Dieppe!

Congratulations to Brian Murphy who was re-elected this evening as the Member of Parliament for Moncton-Riverview Dieppe! It was a close and hard-fought election. Congratulations to all those who put forward their name for public office.


Brian Murphy (Liberal): 17,492
Daniel Allain (Conservative): 16,260
Carl Bainbridge (NDP): 7,589
Alison Ménard (Green): 4,037

Some Canadian election humour from Rick Mercer

Canada elects a new federal government today. Vote!

It is every Canadian's duty to vote in today's federal election. Make your voice heard. Take the time to vote today! If you're not sure when, where or how to vote, click here for more information.

Soldiers died in wars for us to be free. The least we can do is to exercise our vote in their honour.

Monday, October 13, 2008

A WKRP Thanksgiving memory

Happy Thanksgiving!

Happy Thanksgiving to you all! (... well, at least to those of you reading this from Canada!)

Sunday, October 12, 2008

I'm all for realistic-looking dolls, but this is a bit much...

These are ads for Baby Wee Wee, a doll once available in the U.K.

In the second ad, you'll see "Around £39.99" advertised as the price. That's $80.21 in Canadian dollars and $68.17 in American dollars. (As of today's currency exchange rates.) Apparently, they're no longer sold. Can't imagine why. Thank goodness they didn't come out with Baby Ca Ca.